Online Hating

Here's an invitation to those on facebook, bebo, myspace, friendster, friendsreunited, or whatever the new craze is by the time you’re reading this: stop writing to me. Invite me no more to your little corner of cyberspace, I don't want to be your online friend/buddy/chump, I’m quite happy eating my crisps in the corner. Maybe it's just me, but I'm tired of these social networking sites. What are they anyway but tools to judge one another? So we can log on and look up the most popular kid in class to see where he stacks shelves now? Sure we pretend we just want to get back in touch, but we all know deep down we're hoping for the very worst. Seven kids, three wives and no job. That's the jackpot we're spinning for. The bottom line is that if I wanted to stay in touch with you, we'd be talking. Perhaps that's a little harsh, it's just I get grumpy when I receive an email from the biggest social loser I know and he has 897 friends on facebook. Having more friends than I have sterling is just plain greedy as far as I'm concerned. And it's no better when you get a mail from some poor cracker who has a paltry ten friends. Having ten friends on facebook is like having minus friends in real life. You're the social equivalent of a cup. And a novelty cup at that.